cough and cold.

Like a pan of shrivelled yellow paint, my throat itches for a cup of cold remedy tea.


things i like.

  1. Pottery.
  2. Carpentry.
  3. Painting.
  4. Printmaking.
  5. Travelling.
  6. Not working in a confined space.
  7. Natural lighting.
  8. Photography.
  9. Vintage things.
  10. Good films.
  11. Bad films.
  12. Gardening.
  13. The smell of old books.
  14. Playing my uke.
  15. Music.
  16. My God, I like the sound of the bass guitar.
  17. Picturing myself sipping on hot tea whilst sitting next to a window with grids, staring at the view of a not-so-congested traffic on a rainy day.
  18. The smell of rain.
  19. The smell after the rain.
  20. Sunlight.
  21. Dude, food.



Just when I thought solitude wasn’t a totally dreadful idea…

I just had a sensation of loneliness a few minutes ago. It’s nearly the end of Week 3 of my university life and nothing has changed in terms of emotion. I’m still exceedingly homesick and my instinct says “Go home during the weekend and bring your work with you” but the workload is overwhelming. Therefore, it is merely impossible to carry out without losing all of my hair by then.

Despite my urge to return back home, I simply cannot tell my folks that I have been weeping myself to sleep at ungodly hours. I thought calling them would make me feel much better but after ending every call, it just gets worse.

The heart longs for home.


That’s all for now.


One of those days.

I’ve been away from home for 3 weeks and the homesickness has finally kicked in.

I miss everything about home; the sound of my dogs barking downstairs early in the morning, the view of the jungle behind my bedroom, the creaky staircase that’s painful to walk on, the relaxation of watching TV with my mother all day, the excitement of driving my mum’s car, the mellifluous sound of prayers coming from the mosques nearby, the endless decision of places to eat with my folks everyday, eating the same shit everyday, seeing familiar faces, the annoyance of my best pals, the utter silence… I can go on forever.

Everything is so active here. The crowd is bigger. The traffic congestion is insane. The absence of nature. The polluted air. The anxiety of entering the region of public areas.


That’s all for now.


It’s already my third post of the night. Nice.

My mind starts to wander and I start to ponder on the little things… What to eat for breakfast and what to wear for tomorrow’s tutorials?

Alright, it’s not exactly little or important but really, I’m staring at my recently bought groceries from 7/11 (heh funny) and I’m thinking of making a grilled cheese sandwich.

Oh… My decision has been made.

Now for the outfit of the day. I’m looking at my polka-dotted pinafore and a black t-shirt would probably suit.

Wow… Done.

That’s all for now.

Wrecked sleeping schedule.

I’ve initiated the first year of my university life a couple of weeks ago. It’s almost the 3rd week in and my sleeping schedule is wrecked.

My supposed schedule:
8:00 – Lectures.
10:00 – Tutorials.
17:00 or 18:00 — End of school.
18:30 — Dinner.
20:00 — Homework. (Oh dear me)
21:00 — Sleep.

In reality, dinner is skipped most of the time to attempt completing my assignments before midnight. It usually fails and I’d hit the sack at 1am or so. This cycle goes on and on and on until this very day. I don’t get rest on weekends.

Oh well.

That’s all for now.

4. George Harrison.

It plunges the world in misery when one inspiring person departs life. That person may have done unforgettable things that have touched the hearts of people and truly inspired them to bring the great out of one. Indeed, our historical figures certainly have left memorable traces for us to look upon and guide us through life. For me, the person I profoundly admire is George Harrison because of his continuous love for music, effulgent song-writing skills, his humility and his remarkable talents.

George was a former lead guitarist of one of the world’s famous bands, The Beatles. After their disbandment in 1970, it did not stop him from making music. In fact, he collaborated with an Indian sitar virtuoso, who was also his teacher when George was still an active member of The Beatles, Ravi Shankar. Ravi and George composed mellifluous songs together which eventually led them to the opportunity to organize their own concert such as the concert of Bangladesh. Because of their relationship, their partnership was never competitive but perfectly complementary. Furthermore, George was also able to express himself through his music.

He was also remembered as a singer-songwriter. Moreover, he has several best-known Beatles songs such as “Something” and “While My Guitar Gently Sleeps” but my utmost favourite is “Here Comes The Sun”. This song expressed George’s relief at being away from the tensions within The Beatles and their surroundings. It is somehow relatable to my being because I feel like as if he wanted me to acknowledge that there would be dreadful days but I would be rewarded with contentment and relief once I overcome those moments. His lyrics “It’s been a long, cold, lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it’s been here” represents desolation and “Here comes the sun and I say it’s alright” represents relief.

He once said “I want to be successful, not famous” and that made me sense the humility behind it regardless of the simplicity of the quote. Tired of the materialism of the West, George wanted to discover something spiritual and it was through Indian classical music that he wanted to experience Indian spirituality. In addition, he displayed his humble and friendly sides both on the media and the outside, and it was stated that he was a devoted disciple of Mahesh Yogi, a guru in India of religious and non-religious teachings. Eventually, George acknowledged the true meaning of happiness whereby being happy is one of the utmost importance and success in anything is through happiness. Furthermore, he learned the qualities of life through Indian spirituality and one of them is being humble.

Last but not the very least, George was full of remarkable talents. In terms of musical instruments, he was able to play thirty two of them. Five of the thirty two instruments were the sitar, mandolin, keyboard, violin and tambura. He first played the Rubber Soul Song “Norwegian Wood (The Bird Has Flown)” on the sitar. Moreover, particularly between 1966 and 1968, he wrote three songs for the Beatles in Indian style alongside his sitar.

In conclusion, George Harrison is one of the most influential historical figures ever existed. With his prodigious musical skills and exceptional personality, he has the ability to inspire the youth and future generations in composing music and who knows? The one following his foot steps would be the next historical figure.

This essay was meant for my General Paper class and parts of the last third paragraph was plagiarised. I do apologise for that but that day, I was exhausted to make more research due to the scorching hot weather. Furthermore, I did get the facts from a magazine and if I made a mistake, please do not hesitate to correct me. Overall, I did write this from the bottom of my heart because I do admire George Harrison. In fact, I have a massive collection of the Beatles’ stuff but we shall get on that next time.

That is all for now.

3. Trepidation.


: a feeling of fear that causes you to hesitate because you think something bad or unpleasant is going to happen

Emotions are strange, aren’t they? One minute, you are this ball of sunshine which represents full contentment. And the other, you are the gloomy sky which represents desolation.


Now that I’ve closed another chapter in my book, what’s there to write next?” I can never comprehend the use of analogies. I tried. Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that I’ve finally completed my sixth form and what’s next for me is… university. Honestly, I didn’t think that I would make it this far.

A couple of days ago, I was clicking my way through several tabs of university research on the Internet. After hours of the endless eye-soring gaze at my reflected computer screen, I had it all figured out… mostly. I planned to do foundation and language courses in Country A and continue my degree in Country B. I also had some planning done on how to be financially stable as an international student, learn to be utterly independent and do whatever adult-ish things you lot usually do.

I had it all figured out.
And I was happy.


What if it doesn’t turn out the way you want it to be?” What-ifs are one of the most demonic things ever existed.

Before I could wrap everything up, a sense of enigmatic fear built up within me and from there, I ceased to do further research and spent the next couple of days sitting on my lumpy couch, dreading the days whilst not giving much thought on dealing with my future.

Now that I am slightly back on track, I thought about my what-ifs.

1. What if the university in Country A is not recognised in Country B?
2. What if I won’t survive in Country B due to financial problems, racial discrimination and social anxiety?
3. What if I have to stay in Country A to further my studies which I don’t want to because I’m too stubborn?
4. What if I have to live in Country A after completing my degree which I don’t want to?
5. What if people will think low of me for doing my degree in Country A, career-wise?
6. What if I won’t survive in Country A after doing my degree due to its bad case of economical matter?
7. What if I don’t love my course?

And the list goes on.

Now that I’ve read through some of my what-ifs, I realised that Country A gave me a “slight” problem. If only Country A’s PA and government sorted out their priorities, then I (along with other people in my situation) wouldn’t have to live in this vortex of nonsensical turmoil.

Although it’s a little, I’ve made progress today. I’ve decided to check Country A out this month and see where it’ll take me. Moreover, it is best not to rush myself unless I want to end up in an asylum for being overly insane.

While you were reading through, I was actually losing my mind along the way. I thank you for making it this far. I guess you can say that I’M TOO EMOTIONAL TO FUNCTION.

That’s all for now.

2. AS-Level General Paper Guidance.

Firstly, it’s a tad bit odd to write this sort of thing on this blog but I reckon it wouldn’t hurt to help some AS-Level students tackle the difficulties encountered when attempting GP. Secondly, I wrote this for my tutor because he thought it’d be beneficial for his future students to see how I achieved a rather satisfying grade in GP from my perspective. I hope you’ll find this helpful.



*This applies to all sections in GP exam papers*



  • Learning transition words is beneficial as well. E.g. furthermore, for instance, however, etc.



  • Learn at least 5 words per week.

TIP: Use flash cards.

  • Don’t use big words JUST for the sake of impressing the reader. You should learn how to use it appropriately.



  • It makes your reasons sound with your topic.



  • Reading books (and fan-fictions, apparently) also helps you to extend your vocabulary and be familiarised with the proper grammar and sentence structure.



  • You can apply your knowledge on everyday life into GP.
  • For example, you (a student taking Biology) are told to write about Charles II of Spain. You can talk about his deformity caused by inbreeding between the Habsburgs in details; inheriting a faulty allele, gene mutation, etc.



  • You can identify your mistakes and perfect them.
  • Practice makes progress to perfection.



  • You do not want to give an entirely different answer to the question.



  • Have the habit of reading articles from magazines (e.g TIME), newspapers (e.g The Economist) or reliable sources on the Internet.


  • Watch documentaries relating to:
  1. Historical, social, economical and political topics.
  2. Science; environmental issues, health, technology.
  3. Art; Literature, music and arts.



  • It helps to broaden your mind.




  • When in doubt, don’t be afraid to seek advice from your teacher. They’re a lot helpful than you think.
  • Help your teachers to help you. They cannot read your mind.








My opinion: It really depends on the student. It’s a matter of changing attitude and having perseverance. You’re not doing it for your teacher, friends, family but for YOURSELF.


         What do successful students do?

  • Stay active and engaged
  • Hard work
  • Limit social interaction and technology
  • Stay progressive